Apr 02 2009
Count Down To Teenager
It hit me this morning as the alarm was beeping from the girls room and I was trying to convince D that she needed to get up and stop hitting the snooze button that in 17 days I am going to be the mother of a teenager. I’ve known for ages that thirteen comes after twelve, and yet I found myself wondering how could this be.
I have decided I am not ready. I am not old enough. I said the very same things when I was in labor with her. I told a nurse that I didn’t want to do this (be in labor) any more and that I was just going to go home. So somehow I am certain that if I couldn’t stop it then, I can’t stop it now.
Again, time flies for me. Lags for her. I know it does..I remember. But times is about to start changing for her too, though she won’t know it for a while. Not till she looks back and wonders how the hell she got to <insert important life event> because she will still feel 12 somewhere inside. She is clamoring to grow up. Lip gloss and mascara. A boyfriend who walks her home from school. She’s gaining on me in height. She knows so much.
The nurse laughed when I said what I did to her. She smiled and she patted my hand and she said it was too late for that now. No turning back. And now is no different.
I’m not ready. However that doesn’t matter. D is.
